Don’t get me wrong. I am all up for equality and do not turn a blind eye towards racism or inequality in society but having said that, I also don’t believe in social justice and am a firm believer in handling these kind of issues in a certain way that doesn’t end create more inequality at the end.
For example, rather than recording and posting some injustice happening in front of me on Facebook or YouTube, I would rather inform the proper authorities and hand them the video over as evidence. This way, the people involved in the video are not publicly shamed and justice is delivered. We are not judges and it’s not our job to neither pass judgement on others nor publicly shame people who WE consider to be wrong.
This is why I am taking a personal stance against such public shaming quote ‘Real Men like Curves, Only Dogs go for Bones’.
Yes, you read that quote correctly.
There are a lot of variations of this quote online but the idea behind this quote is to empower women who are a bit overweight or fat so that they feel comfortable with their bodies and do not change it because men in society prefer skinny girls.
But in reality, what this quote actually does is that it’s trying to take the freedom away from men who having a specific dating preference and shames them for not dating a woman who is ‘curvy’.
Am I the only one who has a problem with it or is there someone else out there who is also affected by it?
First off, right off the bat – real men date whoever the hell they want to date. Society does not perceive real men as someone who dates fat women. Society depicts “Real Men” as someone is successful, has a stable job, knows what to do, has a clear goal, driven and ambitious. Real Men are often perceived as men who have a strong presence in society and knows how to get the job done.
But most of all, Real Men know how to treat a woman. Mind you, I said a Woman. It could be any woman.
So, if a Real Man is willing to go to school and college, graduate, grind to get a job and grind even harder to rise through ranks and get himself a decent pay, builds the confidence to face any adversity that stand in front of him – then please enlighten me, what gives you the right to dictate who he should and shouldn’t date? You were not there when he getting grades and getting that six figure job, and now when he has them – you decide to drop down on him and try to tell him that he is not a Real Man if he decides NOT to date you.
So what if he wants to date someone who is slim and petite? If he goes to the gym himself and decides to date someone who likes to go to the gym then, what’s the problem?
The problem is not with men who choose not to date you, the problem is you.
You are the problem. Being fat doesn’t make you unattractive. What makes you unattractive is that being fat shows that you eat unhealthy food, eat a lot of unhealthy food, refuse to take care of yourself by working on your body and you live a lifestyle that could end up in you having a heart-condition, diabetes and even some forms of cancer. People primarily date with the intention of finding someone to settle down with and have kids and if you are fat and possess any of these health traits then there is a strong chance that you MAY pass it on to the child as well.
But no, you won’t admit that. Apparently, everything nowadays is about empowering women and it’s definitely not OK to fat shame people but for some reason, it is perfectly OK for fat women to shame slim, petite women who hit the gym, eat healthy and like to take care of themselves by calling them “Bones” or bag of bones.
Just because fat women refuse to work on themselves to make their lives better or healthier, they find it completely ok to shame women who do. You simply use this quote out of sheer hatred against men who have a decent job and turn you down by choosing a partner who is living a healthier life than you. You use this quote out of jealousy against women who look after their lives and end up getting the Real Man who always wanted but while you were sitting on your couch munching pizzas, the slim petite woman was grinding in the gym and eating healthy low-fat food.
‘But I have an eating disorder’.
Eating disorder is not a disease. If I kiss a girl who has an eating disorder, I will not be infecting with eating disorder too. Eating disorders can be controlled with the right kind of exercise and control. There are numerous success stories on the net of women who lost weight so it can be done. It requires commitment and dedication which you obviously, don’t have.
But since we are talking about eating disorders, then I guess you may have heard of a certain eating disorder called Anorexia – an eating disorder that makes people lose their appetite. In other words, they starve themselves to death.
So, here a question: if a guy decides to date a girl who has anorexia, will he be considered a dog for dating someone who has a bony body?
Just try and imagine for once, how a woman would feel who has anorexia.
Remember, you cannot dictate a human being’s life. Everyone has dating preference and it needs to be respected. Some people like to date women who are petite and some like to date women who are of the same ethnicity as them. It doesn’t mean they are dogs or racists, it just means that they are attracted to a certain type of people. Likewise, there are some people who like to date round women and some like to date people outside of their cultural background.
If we are to believe the old saying, ‘There is someone for everyone’, then there is someone out there for you too.
Just to conclude this blog, you are in-charge of your life. If you proud to be overweight, then good on you.
But if you are simply going to hide behind quotes like these and shame men for not choosing you, then you are the one to blame. That whole, Fat Acceptance movement sounds good to hear but reality is, your body is being affected by your fatness. If you are constantly out of breath and if your feet are hurting then that is your body trying to tell you that there is something wrong and you need to do something about it.
And let’s face it, only YOU can do something about it. It’s your life. You need to make a change. You need to motivate yourself and dedicate yourself to a healthier lifestyle. Commit to becoming a better you and work on it.
Remember: you are special. It’s your life. The world doesn’t belong to men, women, white, black, brown or to any other ethnicity, gender or class. It belongs to the people who dare to dream and work hard to make those dreams come true. Be one of them, dare to dream and work hard to accomplish.
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